of.random Monday.&.me.

Shariq turned 13 mth old 2 days ago and when I thought that he'll grow out of the baby koala phase when he's at this age, nampaknya tidak.

He just wouldn't leave me alone when I'm around, so much so that C*** or MIL hafta pry him off me. Yea, it's that bad.

He's been such a good eater for the past week (3 full serving of meal + 5 bottles of EBM whilst I was at work), but came Saturday, he was down with a mild fever and refused to eat much. Yea, mom's world problem over here = kids not eating = much worse than planning for a world domination.

On a lighter note, I have to reconfirm my order for Myra's birthday cake by this week, to finalize on the color and whatnot. I still need to hunt for the raisins in those tiny boxes for her party pack. Also need to finalized the design for the custom stickers. It has been ages since the last time I did any editing work, demi anak ku gagahkan jua, tho I hafta admit that I'm not much a designer to begin with.

Anyway, I'm still in the middle of arranging our itinerary for our week-long getaway. Tho we just gonna stick to one particular city, still lah rasa macam so little time so much to do - since we're traveling with kids, so I think it's wise not to tire them up so much. We hafta put a limit to our activities, kot bujangan boleh la keluar pagi balik malam, with kids, more like keluar pagi and balik before they get too cranky. :P

C*** on the other hand, is still hunting for our accommodation (which doesn't come cheap *lap peluh* ) as I'd prefer for us to rent an apartment - so that I can whip up easy meals for the kids. Jalan-jalan bawak bekal so that I'd be able to stuff them up whenever they are hungry. It would be so much easier on my conscience too, knowing that my kids are not being neglected just because the parents are too eager to travel. he he. Mak bapak dia macam-macam boleh makan, so I don't worry much about us.

Moving on, sometimes last week, during one of the phone calls, I told my mum on how Myra has been wanting to own a play-doh set. Sure, it's not really a grand request, but Shariq is just one and he's not really over the I-put-everything-in-my-mouth phase. Play-doh is the exact kinda toy that I'm trying to avoid - like seriously, play-doh looks pretty yummy to me, if I'm one, I'd probably eat it - I think that I used to have a go at it when I was a kid, I had like tonnes of play-doh set when I was younger, best okeh? Except when you accidentally mixed all the colors together and they turn ugly like shit. :P

So yea, few days after that, mum sent me a picture through whatsApp - a picture of a huge box of play-doh, coz ya know because she 'happened' to be at Parkson and 'accidentally' saw a good play-doh set. Right, as if she hangs out at the toy section often la kan? :P

Pbbff...grandparents, they spoil the kids rotten.

of.new ride.&.me.

MIL is back from her umrah on Monday, but Shariq is still at the daycare until the end of this week - so that MIL can chill for a bit to beat the jet lag and whatnot.

Planning to grab a box of brownies or japanese cream puff to be given to the nannies at the daycare, a token of appreciation or the sort, tho it's not like they are taking care of the baby for free (heck, the fees dah nak sama macam kakak tho it's just for 3 weeks, ad-hoc rate katanya *cough*), now I just need to find a baker to accept my last minute order. :P

Moving on, we had a pretty laid-back weekend. Went out on Saturday for ribs and jalan-jalan for a bit.

We even took out the new stroller for a spin, the kids love it. Now both of them can comfortably sit and stroll but we hafta let Myra sit on the upper seat else her legs gonna dangle awkwardly if she was to be seated on the lower seat. We can't really have a fixed seating arrangement as we might have to switch if the baby nak tidoq because the lower seat couldn't be reclined much compared to the upper seat. The hood is hugee, so much so that we took it off during our stroll in the mall, macam serabut la pulak. ha ha. Tapi when we travel later, kena lah angkut. 

Owh, the stroller comes with a neck support pillow, a cup holder, a matching diaper bag and a rain cover. The storage basket underneath is of a decent size, boleh la nak sumbat apa-apa yang patut.

The stroller is pretty awesome. It's as small as our single stroller but just a bit longer when folded (dan tak muat kalau nak letak dalam my compact car or C***'s small car, so it got a permanent place in our MPV instead). Maneuverability wise is pretty decent, the handles are at a good height for both of us tho it's not adjustable.

Sure it's a wee bit heavier than what we're used to, but it's a double stroller so it's somewhat expected. It's an umbrella fold too, tho the folding and unfolding need a bit of getting used to. If dulu can fold with one hand and a kaki, now kena lah use both hand and a kaki and fasten the straps to lock em in place and whatnot - we even bought an extra strap to further tighten the fold. Dulu less than a minute, now probably 4 minutes. ha ha. Well, it's C***'s job, so yea, have fun hon.

On a lighter note, when we got the stroller, we noticed that the front wheel is a wee bit wobbly. It's probably not a big deal, but knowing that we're buying this stroller for our next trip and we couldn't afford the risk of the wheels tercabut or malfunction in any way as we'll be walking a lot, we contacted the seller and even sent her a video of the said wheel. The feedback was pretty quick, we'll be getting a replacement front wheel coming our way soon, so yey! Brownies point disitu!

Owh, I forgot to mention which stroller that we bought. Didn't I? he he. We got our hands on this Merricart tandem stroller at a good price - ours is the black frame in red polka dot (pasrah je C***). ha ha. We decided to grab it from a local seller, instead of jadi kiasu and tunggu dah sampai our destination baru beli stroller sebab nak brand lagi best dan lagi murah - like what I mentioned in my previous post. I mean, kalau sampai sana baru nak beli stroller, jenuh la nak heret budak berdua sans stroller - what with the luggage and all, and there's no guarantee that the stroller is readily available in the store, buatnya takde?  So yeah, out with the kiasu-ness, in with the practicality.

So yea, there goes my quick review, will post up a photo in my ig when I feel like it. ;)

Well, later.

of.too fast for my liking.&.me.

Kids, they grow up, so fast. Too fast for my liking sometimes.

Shariq, at 1 year old. Is calling almost everyone in the house mama. ha ha. Tho the most amusing thing about this is, when he wakes up in the middle of the night for nursing, instead of crying, he'll try to reach out for me from his cot whilst panggil " Maaa..maaaa". I guess that's baby's language for "I'm hungry now mom. Please wake up and feed me".

He also knows how to ask for something by pointing to the object of his desires - and if you picked up the wrong item, he'll shake his head. You can even ask him a simple yes or no question and tho he doesn't nod in approval, he'd surely geleng if he disagrees. Kids these days ey? Bak kata my MIL, budak baru menetas dah pandai macam-macam. :P

This little boy of mine is pretty clever too (don't mind me, mothers think that their kids are genius), the other day, when I was about to give him a bath, I stripped him off his clothes and suddenly he went running into the room, I called out for him, but no respond and when I was about to look after him, he came back with his pjs that he took from his little closet. Amazeballs sangat. Tak lama lagi dah bleh tolong fetch barang ni.

He's doing great in getting down from the bed. Few times that I left him to sleep on our bed and went out to the kitchen to sort on things, the next thing you know, dia dah terkedek-kedek jalan out of the bedroom as if nothing happen. Like yea, don't mind me mom, I just got up and now nak jalan pi main toys sat. The first time it happened I was dumbstruck, like how on earth did you manage to get down? Our bed is pretty high compared to the normal standard. Normally, he'd cry out for me whenever he's awake and nobody's around, ni senyap-senyap dah turun sendiri. Amazing but scary if you ask me.

Owh, I missed out on the he-finally-walks-now update, yea, he started his first few steps probably a week before his first birthday. These days, he doesn't walk anymore, he runs. Not sprinting run, but run all the same. Kita tengok pulak takot that he'll fall flat on his face or something.

He's a good eater this days, bagi lah makan apa pon, habis - tho he's not as chubby as he used to be - but as long as I know that he's eating well. Good enough for me.

Owh, he's now a toddler with 6 little gigi, no sign of others coming out yet.

He's done with his pneumococcal shots which is great.

Moving on.

What's new with Myra? She's as talkactive as ever. She's good in asking for things. She made us bought her a kid's size apron. She'll negotiate her way into getting her little hands on my depleting stock of matcha kitkats.

She'll go

"Mummy, all friends kakak dah pegi Legoland, Myra jer not yet"
"Yer ke? Saper dah pegi?"
"Sofea dengan adik."
"Two jer? Kata all"

T_________T

Exaggerate sangat kau nak, nanti la kita pi Disneyland, Legoland hafta wait for a bit, sekarang ni panas sangat, nanti mak emosi sebab as much as I like to jalan-jalan, I don't do jalan-jalan tengah panas (don't mind me, I'm not much of an outdoor person to begin with). Legoland is panas (or so I heard. he he).

Yea, besides that, dah pandai jugak ajak duduk hotel.

T________T

Kids these days, but I guess it's a normal phase. I love hotels when I was younger too, I still do now. Hotels = good food + unlimited pool time.

My dad used to travel a lot for work, so whenever possible, we tagged along. Even when he's not working pon, he loves to splurge on good hotels. There was a time when we'd stay in a hotel on weekend like twice in a month, walaupon setakat duduk kat Shangri-la Penang tho rumah just dekat Kedah which is like sekangkang kera away.

The good old days. :)

Ni update pasal mak ke anak? I digress.

She's a pretty good eater too these days, tho you hafta make sure that it suits her taste buds, kalau rasa tak ngam, terus pangkah, pedas la, apa la - padahal setitik cili pon tak letak. Kalau sedap to her tongue, she'd ask for a second, sometimes a third - which is quite amusing since she's still owh-so-skinny. hi hi.

Well, I was skinny too when I was at her age, so yeah, sekarang tidak lagi. :P

Gonna get our new stroller today, great - you know you're such a makcik when buying a stroller makes ya happy.

Owh well?

of.super mak.&.me.

It has been more than a week since the 1st day for the wee one at the daycare. How he's doing? Good I guess.

How am I doing? Hmpp..not so great. I feel like a balancing act in a circus. he he. Imagine me, with a baby, 5 bags (FS bag, handbag, cooler bag, the kids' bags) and a toddler in tow. Not a pretty sight.

Pagi-pagi dah rasa macam running a marathon (not like I ever join one). Habis cayaq makeup mak - not like I wear much makeup to begin with, but ya know, whatever left of it pon dah habis by the time I dropped them off to school.

That my friend, is just the first half of the marathon because once I picked them up from school, the 2nd half began.

The cooking (both for our dinner & Shariq's food for the next day), the cleaning, the ironing, the washing - minus the folding. I don't do folding - doesn't matter if there's a mount Everest of clothes unfold pon. :P

I tried to skip the cooking part, so I could relax for a bit, but the fridge is so well stocked that it makes me feel guilty. Owh, the cooking for us I mean, not the kids, I strive to cook for them everyday, especially Myra lah (Shariq memang pagi petang siang malam makan food mak dia masak, susu pon mak dia produce.hahaha. TMI), during weekdays, at least she gets to eat my cooking once/day for dinner.

Like yea, seronok membeli groceries tapi malas masak just doesn't sound right - tho it's not like I'll be doing something fancy, last night it was fettuccine carbonara with brown mushroom and streaky beef which was done within 30 minutes. 

By the time I hit the bed, I'm truly drained but pretty contented. Looking at the amount of work done - rasa macam super mak sangat. ha ha.

On a lighter note, I already bought the double stroller, calmly waiting for it to be shipped over. Will write a quick review about it once it's here.

We have 2 months to work on the passports for our upcoming trip - more than enough time to procrastinate . Mine and Myra's expired last year and Shariq is going to have his first passport photo taken - I can't wait.

Meanwhile, I also have to work on the party pack for Myra's 4th birthday. I'm yet to look around for her cake. *lap peluh*

Well, later.

of.adapting.&.me.

You're the light, you're the night
You're the color of my blood
You're the cure, you're the pain
You're the only thing I wanna touch
Never knew that it could mean so much, so much

You're the fear, I don't care
'Cause I've never been so high
Follow me through the dark
Let me take you past our satellites
You can see the world you brought to life, to life

So love me like you do, lo-lo-love me like you do
Love me like you do, lo-lo-love me like you do
Touch me like you do, to-to-touch me like you do
What are you waiting for?

Fading in, fading out
On the edge of paradise
Every inch of your skin is a holy grail I've got to find
Only you can set my heart on fire, on fire
Yeah, I'll let you set the pace
'Cause I'm not thinking straight
My head's spinning around I can't see clear no more
What are you waiting for?

Love me like you do, lo-lo-love me like you do (like you do)
Love me like you do, lo-lo-love me like you do
Touch me like you do, to-to-touch me like you do
What are you waiting for?


ELLIE GOULDING  - Love me like you do.


So yea, what are you waiting for? :P

Anyway, I'm having this playing in a loop in my head these days - finally done with my Ed Sheeran phase.

Life is pretty hectic now. What with the requirement studies for the new enhancement. The infra-upgrade. The stroller dilemma (yea, still deliberating. Fickle-minded much?). The accommodation hunt for our upcoming family getaway and I'm yet to work on the itinerary.

The anticipation for the much awaited *cough* bonus *cough* because I have the need to splurge on something.

I'm a changed person you know? I think that at some point in the recent years, I've stopped being the crazy bag-lady. I've stop ogling over designer bags - okay, I lied, I still like looking at them, but not as much as I did previously.

Sure I still grabbed one or two along the way, but nothing too fancy, you know, none of the almost-habis-gaji-sebulan thing anymore, the last time was during the first few years that I just started working (kot?).  I'm absolutely calmer now, I don't salivate (over those bags) as much too. he he.

On a lighter note, last Monday was the 1st day for the wee one at the daycare. How he's doing? Well, probably better than Myra during her first day in playschool.  Myra was 3 y/o when we started sending her off to school, Shariq just turned one, the younger you send them in, the better they adapt, I guess. It also helps that Myra is around to 'look' after her baby brother. Ada tukang report bila balik rumah. he he.

Back to his first day. He obviously cried a little. Refused his usual dose of milk - he survived on 2 bottles of milk (out of 5) and 3 portions of porridge. He ate a lot. I don't know whether I should laugh or cry - but as long as he's not starving, then I guess that I shouldn't fret much tho I'd direct feed him as much as possible at home (at one point he just refused to open his mouth altogether. he he).

On another lighter note, since he's not taking much EBM at the daycare, I've been able to stock up on my milk stash.  Every cloud has a silver lining, yes?

Moving on, the in-laws (including MIL) will be off for umrah today. Semoga selamat pergi and balik. :)

of.nagging feeling.&.me.

I want to rant about this nagging feeling in my guts about sending the wee one to daycare.

Yea, a change in routine for him, for us starting next week.

I don't fret much about mine, but I'm pretty worried about what it gonna do to the little one, what with his baby-koala phase and everything.

I hope he won't fuss much. I hope he'll be an easy baby for the nanny. I hope that he'll finish up his EBM and food. I hope that he won't have any trouble sleeping at the daycare, he doesn't sleep much during the day nowadays.

I hope that they don't find him too spoilt or troublesome to be taken care of.

I don't know what to expect.

This is my 2nd baby but I'm still fretting like a first-timer.

*sighs*

How la?

of.little genius.&.me.

Yesterday was more or less like any other day, I got home from work, trapped in the usual traffic for a bit - I changed my mind - a lot, since I was pretty late to pick up Myra from school.

Talked to the teacher for a bit. She commented on how good Myra is doing in school, a direct quote would be

"each time ajar the group, she would be the first one to remember everything"

The teacher even asked whether I'm teaching her at home which I replied with a quick " no".

Honestly, I'm pleased - I am after all, easy to please. What a music to this exhausted mother's ears. he he.

I have to admit that we never really bother to press her when it comes to educational stuff, whatever she's been absorbing for the past few years, has been done rather casually - when she comes to us asking about stuff, then we'd teach her.

When she asked for crayons or pencil to color and write, then we'll let her. Sure we'd show her how to do it and stuff, but we're never stern about it. Nak buat, buat, tamau buat, ok dah, pegi main lompat-lompat.

Sometimes we'd point out the headlines printed on the cover of a news paper or a magazine and ask her to spell it out, but that's just for fun.

Sometimes we'll recite all those short surahs together in the car whilst driving to school, tho most of the time it's me reciting whilst she's listening. :P

Sometimes we'd play the alphabet games together on the tablet, but that's about it.

It's not like I'd spend a solid hour everyday teaching her the alphabet, numbers, nursery rhymes, iqra and whatnot.

Even when I feel like teaching her something, sometimes she'll run off after 5 minutes, so yea, that's as much as 'home schooling' that she ever gets. :P

She'll be 4 next month but we don't see the need to burden her with home works yet. I am the typical Asian mother, but probably without the added kiasu-ness - well, fine, I am a wee bit kiasu but not so much.

I don't want her to start off on the wrong track, I don't want her to think that when it comes to educational stuff, it's such a bore. I want her to learn and have fun whilst she's at it.

I'm not writing this to gloat. I'm writing this so that when she's big enough to stalk me on my blog, I want her to know that she's my little genius and I'm proud of her - despite all the meltdowns and drama. he he.

I love you darling, to the moon and back. *peluk ketat-ketat*

of.time to double.&.me.

Nope, not talking about doubling up the number of kids, I'm not that crazy yet. I need another year, or two or three. :P

Anyway,we're in the midst of planning our 1st trip as a family of four.

Honestly, our last quick getaway was months ago - and it's only a few hours drive away - and it's starting to irk me when I'm not traveling. Like seriously, what on earth is stopping us? Money? Work? Kerja sampai mati pon tak abis.

Anak kecik? Susah travel? Yeah, that sounds more like us :P

I mean, I'm not much of a globe hunter pon, but I'd like to make it a routine for us to go on our own getaways every now and then, be it near or far.

We didn't go places last year, I was heavily pregnant during the 1st quarter and later, it goes without saying that we decided not to travel with a newborn.

Shariq gonna turn one this month and once he's done with his vaccinations ( MMR & last dose of pneumococcal), mari lah travel.

So yea, during our last trip to Beijing, Myra was almost 2 y/o. We dragged along our trusted Peg Perego stroller and Boba SSC (which has been ever so useful, I climbed the Great Wall with a toddler sleeping on my back).

Now that we have two babies (albeit one is a real baby and the other one is more like a cry baby), I'm thinking of getting my hands on a double stroller. A stadium seating is a must (there's no way around it) and if possible a light umbrella fold.

I'm not crazy about bulky, super expensive strollers, no matter how attractive they look.

I'm practical and a cheapskate just like that. I mean, even with our current stroller pon mak mengah nak fold and unfold (exaggerate sikit), what if it's a huge bulky double stroller. I might as well, sit in a corner and cry - or maybe not. :P

Okay, drama much? - but ya, that's the point.

Did I tell ya I'm not really into super expensive strollers? Like 2k is my limit, anything over that is bleh, it's just a freaking stroller, tapi if I could get my hands on an el-cheapo (but reliable) one, lagi mak gumbira.

I only have 3 strollers in my KIV list, a Miniwalker double stroller (or now known as Merricart from our jiran Spore), Kinderwagon double stroller (from US tapi sebijik macam Miniwalker/Merricart jugak, tak tau who copied who,I think the former. he he) and Cosatto Shuffle All Star stroller.

All of these are within my budget and whilst I was browsing around, I just found out that 2 (the Kinderwagon & Cosatto) of em are being sold way cheaper in our destination country, like here, I want that, take my money already.

T__________________T

Now I'm counting on the possibility of C*** going there for a quick work trip - so that he'd be able to hunt for the stroller before our travel date which equals to penjimatan berganda (RM500 is good money to me, mak bleh beli Fitflop sepasang), else I hafta settle with the the marked up Malaysian price.

Owh, Miniwalker is just around RM1200, cheaper compared to the former two - Malaysian price that is.

Hmpp...

so how now brown cow?

of.arrangement.&.me.

MIL will be away for umrah soon, most likely around the same time like she did last year, in March - which is sometime this month.

I've called the principal of Myra's playschool, asked if it's possible to have a temporary slot for the wee one for a month. She said yes!

 Alhamdulillah. .

Else God knows the kind of misery that I'll be in. At least I don't have to fret about going to two different places to drop off the kids. Having the kids at the same place, I'd be comforted by the thought that the wee one is not alone in a new place, at least Myra is around (& she's awesome with her kid brother so boleh la tolong pujuk adik, kalau mood dia baik that is) - tho they are obviously gonna be placed within their respective age group.

Nothing is more comforting than a familiar face when you're stranded somewhere unfamiliar. Yes?

More so now that Shariq is in his baby-koala phase, he just doesn't warm up to stranger as quick as he did previously.

So yea, now that we've secured a place for Shariq, I just got myself a new cooler bag (a fridge-to-go which is awesome) for his EBM. Need to get a new set of iron-on labels for his clothes and probably a bunch of customized labels for his bottles and stuff (check out Fun Printz, they are pretty alright, a local alternative to Bright Star Kids/ Tinyme labels).

Myra started going to playschool when she's 3, so I didn't have the go through all the hassle of preparing EBM and solid food for day care.

So yea, all us of hafta learn something new everyday eh?

Anyway, we're not sure of what the arrangement gonna be like post-umrah. Whether MIL still gonna stay with us or she's going back home and Shariq gonna be sent to day care permanently.

Shariq gonna turn one this month, sending him off to day care at that age, wouldn't be that bad.

Kot?

Allahumma yassir wa laa tu`asir 

of.another randomness.&.me.

How does one measure love?

I have no idea.

When a husband gave in to your you-are-over-your-head idea. It's a sign of love kah?

It surely sounds like love to me. :P

Will ramble about that later.

Two of the cousins are getting married this year - which is awesome.

MIL is going for another umrah this year, about the same time as last year, probably just a wee bit later - I have to make some arrangement for Shariq's daycare.

I need a new Fitflop. Decided that my 9th pair should be a Skinny croc in Bronze, a simple one for the win - too bad that the last time that I went to Bratpack, they didn't have it in my size.

I need a new wallet. I hope there's something extra in March's paycheque *cough* bonus *cough* to accommodate this need.

I'm currently scouting for party pack ideas for Myra's 4th birthday - playschool edition, 35 kids altogether, which includes the kindy, play school and day care. Kalau her group, baru 8 orang. :P
I'm thinking of toxic-free crayons( gonna buy them in bulks) and probably some air kotak/choc milk, Oreos, small bars of milk choc (maybe? A wee bit of chocolate wouldn't hurt. Kot? My Myra loves dark choc, but I don't think other kids would appreciate that), little box of raisins, Twiggies (maybe? Keji tak bagi cake/roti? ha ha.) and the sort,but nope, no jajan.

I hate to admit that I've..hmppp..thrown away some of the stuff in the party packs that Myra brought back home - almost weekly. I mean, some of those looks soo...inedible. Eg. Colorful jelly/candy made in China - especially those with all-wrritten-in-Chinese packaging.

I don't know bout you but I have a thing about food made in China. Rasa sungguh, unsafe, but I'm anal just like that.

I feel bad - the thought of the money spent on those jajan, but I'd feel worse if I were to feed those to my kid.

I'm not much of a kiasu mummy, I have my kiasu moments for sure, but what I deem unfit for my kids, the same goes to others. Takkan nak kumpul pehtu bagi kat anak orang lain pulak?

Moving on.

We found a place to satisfy our craze for mee tarik. The noodles are awesome, so is the cumin lamb chop. My ultimate favourite. If I couldn't be bothered of what those fatty juicy lamb gonna do to my arteries, I'd go there weekly. :P

Anyway, we went back up North last week, C*** had to work in Penang on Friday, so we tagged along. After 2 long weeks, baru lah dapat jumpa the little nephew (Hello Muhammad Adam Rayyan!). He's so small and smells owh-so-heavenly. I'm yet to get him anything big - except for a set of cute bandana bibs.

Haih. I love newborn, they are so easy to please, bagi susu, tukar diaper, tido, settle - everything is dandy, except for the bangun-200-kali-malam-malam-for-milk that is.

Dah anak dua, boleh la cakap. :P

Don't mind me whilst I gloat in my mak-anak-dua glory.

Back to work then. Tata.

of. SM 10 months.&.me.

Shariq is teething these days,as he's been drooling pretty excessively in the past few days. Not much into food but finish up his milk like a champ. 3 little gigi to-date (2 more on the way). Right upper central incisor and both of his lower central incisor. Budak kecik tiga gigi.

He's a pretty easy baby that boy. Good appetite (except when he's teething) and no more bottle-rejection issues - which is such a huge relief. It's heart breaking knowing that your baby is having a hard time during milk time whilst you're at work.

Talk about milk.

------MY RAMBLING ABOUT BF STARTS HERE----

He's still a breastfeed baby. 10 months of nursing is not easy tho it's pretty easy compared to those that I hafta endure with Myra - physically and emotionally.

I still get the usual 

"Anak dia semangat betul, sekali minum susu 5oz, minum susu ____(insert expensive brand name here) sehat la dia".

True story. In fact, someone told me that only yesterday - as if telling me that I'm inadequate, as if I'm not taking care of my baby properly, sebab tak bagi susu mahal.

Yea thanks, the last time I checked, people did mention something about mom's milk = liquid gold. Tak pernah pulak orang cakap susu lembu tu liquid gold. ha ha.

Okay, that's me being defensive. Those people still irks me sometimes. I'm still human after all tho I still have nothing against FM mommies - in fact Myra pon on FM once she stopped nursing when she was a year and a half.

Everyone craves for the best for their kids. It's just those FM-obsessed people that I detest, especially some of those brain-washed makciks who thinks that you're not feeding your kids enough if you're not on FM, but let's not go there.

Everyone has their own battles, this is mine. To put it frankly, I couldn't be bothered bout what others think about BF. If they think that it's great, then yey us. If they think that it's too troublesome yada yada, then fine. I don't preach. I don't judge. It's not my place to judge, like ever.

I'll just do whatever that I can do, as long as Allah permits, as simple as that.

Back to BF, the pumping, storing, cleansing and whatnot adelah nothing tortures - but it requires a heart of steel dan kerajinan - that I hope won't vanish anytime soon. he he.

The baby could easily finish up 20 to 24 oz of EBM (4oz/bottle) whilst I'm at work - which might be normal for some, but for an average milk-mom like me, adelah menangis.

Shariq's daily dose are mostly chilled EBM from the day before tho sometimes selit-selit jugak the frozen EBM - just to regulate the stock or when I couldn't pump enough.

I'm currently not pumping enough on most days *cries* - not pumping enough in my definition adelah I can't provide enough chilled EBM for him the next day dan terpaksa topup with the frozen ones - most time a bottle (5oz), on a bad day, two.

The only time for me to replace those frozen stock is on Friday and weekend. My current frozen EBM adelah around 250oz - dangerously low, considering that I'd keep twice as much previously, only 2 out of the 4 drawers of my upright freezer are filled with em now. I hope that I'll sustain whilst trying to increase my productivity (this sounds so wrong. Owh well) - I need to replace at least 30oz weekly. How laaaa? Okay lah, TMI already.

--------END OF BF RAMBLING -------

Moving on.

He's currently on his I-am-a-baby-koala phase. Yup, whenever I'm around he'd follow me around like a shadow. When he's not in my arms, you'd certainly find him at my heels, demanding to be picked up. Yeah, whilst I love to feel needed, it gets pretty tricky sometimes, especially when you're trying to have some me-time in the shower or when you're about to wash your hair, you'll hear a little knocks on the door. Yup, he already learned how to knock on doors.

T___T

Well, he can actually stand unsupported these days, counting days before he'll be able to walk! I cannot wait, on a second thought, I don't mind waiting for a bit. Now that he crawls all over the house, childproofing gets pretty hard. We even had to 'hide' some of Myra's toys as some of em can be chocking hazards - which annoys the big sister a little. he he.


 Mata mana, mata?

Haih, I love him so much, that boy.

of.eventful long weekend.&.me.

I had one of the most eventful long weekend.

Went back home up North to spend the days off with moi family. The traffic was pretty kind, we even had a quick pit-stop in Ipoh for Nasi Ganja (dad's favourite and now the other half's). Did nothing much but stuffed myself silly, hang out with my mum, laze around doing nothing but I managed to stock up bottles of EBM whilst I'm at it. Multitasking at its best.

It was hot and humid on most days, so we were at home most of the time except for a bunch of a quick drive here and there (to hunt for, ermm..food).

Dad is doing fine. Now that he's still recuperating tho I think it gonna take sometime more for him to get back to his old self, if ever - as he's still not talking much and for a such a loud person as he is, it's pretty odd. It has been more than 7 months since the last time I heard him talked (tho I have a video of him talking, accidentally recorded during one of those video calls, it's painful to watch) and thinking about it is pretty overwhelming sometimes.

Well, you never know what you're missing until it's gone eh?

The kids had fun as usual. Myra loves the attention, as usual. Shariq was stuck to me like a baby koala, as usual.

We got back home on Monday as C*** hafta work on Tuesday. Yup, no public holiday for him, so it was just me and the kids on Tuesday. It was mind boggling having to juggle between a 10 mth old and a 3 y/o - especially when the 10 mth old think that crawling into the bathroom whilst I'm trying to take a leak is funny.

T_____T

I don't think that I wanna be a SAHM anymore. ha ha.

Anyway, amidst the chaos, I managed to cook for the kids. Fried rice and fruity oatmeal for breakfast. Fish soup with vege and rice for Myra's lunch and whatever-food-puree-I-could-find-in-the-freezer for the baby.

Me? I had their leftovers and probably a quarter loaf of an awesome butter cake - got it from my fav bakery back home, always love their arrays of breads and when I saw their butter cake, I shamelessly asked  

"Sorry tanya dik, ni cake butter ke, cake majerin?"

No offense and thankfully, none taken. I'm anal just like that, I don't do fake butter cake. Alang-alang nak gemuk, biar lah dengan rasa yang sebenar. :P

Made dinner at 4pm whilst the kids were asleep, so yea, I ain't too shabby right? (Please don't mind me.)

So yea, we have a wedding to attend on Saturday and we're due for a visit to an aunt's place, I just need to get a cake. I promised her a cake - but a cake from my fav baker is impossibrruu, unless I don't mind waiting for the next 2-3 months or something.

I ordered a box of mini choc pavlova from her for Myra's birthday in April like 2 weeks ago, yup, almost 4 months in advance. Kegilaan apekah ini? That's just the pavlova, I'm yet to find the cake, I don't think the kids gonna fancy a Cherry Matcha cake, that's more like something that I'd like to have for my birthday instead.

Well, later.

of.prepared.&.me.

I've been meaning to update on the kids' milestones this week, but I've been busy working on the Thai's project FSD and whatnot.

Whilst I was going through the office mail this morning, got a call from the boss and when his opening line sounded like this

"I don't know whether this is a good or a bad news.."

I know whatever news that I'm about to hear won't be pretty.

So yea, another bump on the Thai's project, it seems like it's going to be postponed yet again, this time, well into 2016.

Honestly, I'm quite pissed off.

Simply because I've put so much efforts into it and it's annoying to stop half way. I just wanna get it over it.

Like seriously, I've put my mind into it ever since the boss told me that traveling is inevitable for me this time around.

Nope, not because I'm looking forward to all the traveling - yes, I want to travel far this year, but traveling for work is not really what I have in mind - but in all honesty, I've been preparing myself mentally for the work and travel.

I've been telling myself not to fret much about the kids, especially the wee one who's still a BF baby (don't let me start about BF whilst traveling). I've been telling myself that I'll lug the entire family with me, so that I won't be alone and worried in a foreign city.

Ya know, I've been telling myself a whole lots of thing.

So when you finally got a good grip of yourself, datang pulak this dreaded news, I don't know whether I should be sad or happy. *shrugs*

Some might go, "Kecoh jer lebih, pegi siam jer pon?" .

May I remind you that it's not the distance which bugs the hell outta me, but the thought of leaving the kids behind and even if I were to drag the entire household along with me, C*** hafta take some time off from work (the trip is 5-days long, times 2), MIL hafta come along too etc.

Nampak domino effect di situ?

It's not as easy as " Okay, I'm off now, see you in 5 days!".

Like it doesn't feel right to leave them under the care of the other half and the MIL whilst I'm working thousands miles away. Sure, nothing is wrong with that, nobody bats an eye when the husband is away for work (or not), why should it be any different when it comes to me kan?

True, but it just doesn't feel right to me. It doesn't feel right to let them shoulder those tasks that are initially mine, like preparing food for the kids, especially the baby and let's not talk about EBM, my other half know pretty much nothing (something that I'm not proud of, now that we're parents of two) and MIL only knows how to warm up the EBM that I've prepared. So yeah, it doesn't feel right to put them through all the hassle so that I'd get to travel for work.

I feel guilty enough having MIL at our place to take care of the baby whilst we're at work, ni nak tinggal for a few days lagi lah...pffff..

My sick sick conscience.

Ha ha. How's that for a mom's dilemma?

I'm not judging those jet-setter mommies who doesn't seem to have any issue traveling the world, I probably wouldn't make a big fuss out of this someday, especially when my kids are older.

Who knows?

To each, their own yes?

So yea, let's not complicate things any further, as for now, I'd just move on and be happy. :P

Enough of my rambling. Happy (long) weekend!

of.hectic weekend.&.me.

Shariq turned 10 month old yesterday and truthfully, I was sorta preoccupied with the house chores and groceries shopping that I actually forgot this particular leap of age.

Well, after working on the endless house chores, baru perasan that I'm running out of food for Shariq (whilst I was sorting the EBM in the freezer) and  since I had to stock up on the groceries, I dragged the entire house out for a quick groceries shopping yesterday - the kids, MIL and me - as C***'s away on a quick trip to Japan.

On a side note, Myra has been wanting to go out since Saturday - now that she sorta got a grip on the concept of weekend and weekdays, she woke up on Saturday and  went  

"Mummy, today Saturday kan? Saturday kita pegi shopping, jalan-jalan".

"Tapi daddy work." said I.

"Mummy la drive car bawak Myra jalan-jalan jer okay? Drive car mummy jer, tak payah kereta big"

T___T

Yup, that's absolutely my kid alright. he he.

I had Shariq strapped onto my chest whilst Myra sat on the shopping cart during our short little outing, I have absolutely no problem shopping with the kids, but I wish that C*** was around to carry the groceries when we got home. I never really have to bother bout it when he's around, so when he's not, semput sat. Talks about taking someone for granted eh? :P

Fast forward, C*** got back home at 9PM. The kids missed him like crazy, I do to - padahal he was away for 3 days je pon. Probably because he was away during the weekend (and weekend is our family time), instead of the weekdays.

On work days, I'll be busy at work and when I'm home I have the kids to handle, there's ain't much time left to wallow in sadness, loneliness or anything - tho it's not like I'm home alone, but having him around is different. Yea, I'm clingy like that. ha ha.

I'm so going to bury my head in the sand if C*** ever read this.

So yea, he brought back a few months worth of Lush stuff for me which is awesome (and they are cheap compared to our neighboring country *cough* Singapore *cough*) and I better use em before they go bad - being fresh and all, some of the items' shelf life are pretty short. The more reason to start taking care of moi skin, I am, after all adelah 30. Sob. Sedar diri much?



He also got me packs of Matcha chocolates, a new LE tumbler and hmpp..nothing for the kids.Takpe lah, the kids wouldn't know the different pon kalau beli barang diorang kat jusco. They are a wee bit too small to appreciate the different. Budak-budak tak dapat souvenir tak kisah pon, tapi kalau mak dia yang tak dapat apa-apa, _____ sila isi tempat kosong. :P

Well, that's about it. Hafta catch up on the kids' milestones later. Ta ta.

of.production deployment.&.me.

Last week was pretty hectic. The entire week of work was about the upcoming deployment. Had various code change before finally settling down for the final version - the last one was on Friday, hours before the production deployment itself.

So yea, had a scheduled system upgrade deployment otherwise known as the dreaded graveyard shift. C***'s my loyal, awesome companion - as usual. He just got back from JB on Friday, and few hours later, he had to drive me to work. If I were to be honest, I felt guilty as hell, knowing that he's pretty worn out after the long drive home, lepas tu ade pulak orang tu kena keja malam kannn? The timing couldn't have been 'better'.

We were like 10 minutes late (the deployment started at midnight and they started off without me, I am after all, only needed for the verification and troubleshooting) - because I dozed off whilst nursing the baby - terjaga dah pukul 11.30PM. Great.

I got out of the room, thinking that C***'s probably asleep too (hence the reason why he didn't wake me up), but....found him in the front hall, tengah main game instead. I is mad. ha ha.

Dah la orang tu baik hati nak tolong temankan keja tengah malam, tapi kena marah pulak, like why didn't you wake me??

"I'm about to wake you up, tunggu 11.30PM" he replied.

Righhhttt.

On second thought, it's obviously my fault, sendiri nak pegi keja, saper suruh tido. ha ha.

Yea, ampun. I was damn sleepy and wasn't thinking straight. 

T___T

Honestly, I'm just too old for this.

So yea, we went to work, well, I went to work whilst taking C*** along with me. Told him that everything gonna be done in an hour, 2 hours max - but it turned out to be 3 hours. We had to sort out some coding issues.

Grrrr...

I.HATE.CLEANING.UP.AFTER.OTHER.PEOPLE'S.MESS.

*sighs*

Got back home half an hour after 3AM. Shariq was awake and MIL was about to heat up a bottle for him, so fed him myself and we were off to la la land not long after.

Haih. I'm sorry for the trouble C***, what would I do without you?

Tho you know, I hate to sound like a damsel in distress. It's not like I'm not used to driving myself to work at night before, but it had been like what? More than 5 years since the last time - somehow, sometime within that span of time, saya dah jadi penakot. :P

It's a scary world we're living in these days, I wouldn't blame me.

After all, that's what the other half is for, to keep me safe (& deliriously happy.) Yes?

of.first weekend.&.me.

So how's my first weekend of the year went? It was a pretty relaxing weekend. We went out for breakfast on Saturday. Had a wee bit of shopping spree right after that. Someone *cough* just got *cough* his bonus. :P

Bought a bunch of cute shirts for yours truly and Myra - but couldn't find anything interesting for the little one.

We came back home, had lunch and C*** got into one of his rare spring-cleaning mood but here's the catch, he decided that he gonna help ME to throw out some of MY stuff that I've been hoarding since forever.

T___T

Like yea, thanks hon. I probably needed that.

He unearth a huge trolly bag - which probably hasn't seen the sunlight for millions of years, okay, not millions, but 5 years are just as long. The funny thing is, some of the clothes in the bag are new. Without tags but new - and I went "I didn't even know that I have this!". I probably just packed em all up without much thinking (when I moved out of my rented place) and somehow forgotten all about em - which shows how unnecessary those clothes are, kalau necessary, dah lama lah unpack the bag. 

I even found one of my favourite denim skirt and luckily, it still fits. Chucked most of em into our 'donation' bag (which will be sorted again later) - except those items that will be used at home as you know, baju rumah - after 5 years, surely there's no more outing-worthy clothes in there. Mostly dah outdated in style and err..size. :P

The whole spring cleaning thing was pretty easy on me this time, I didn't even get all mopey about it. After all, something hafta be done with the under-utilized clothes kan? I've been procrastinating for way too long. What's new with that?

Moving on, the next day, we went out to restock on the groceries. C*** even got a new gadget for the kitchen. Someone is mighty pleased with his purchase, making coffee is just a button-press away.

Well, the kids are down with mild flu - so much so that Shariq woke up pretty grumpy this morning (sometime before 6AM) and after countless of fruitless attempts to put him down to sleep again, I gave up and let him melepek on my chest, on which he eventually nodded off, then baru lah transfer to his cot and he slept for an hour and a half more. Myra on the other hand, is pretty much her usual self, despite the snot and all that.

Well, whilst dropping Myra off at school today, there's a parent trying to cajole her screaming little girl to get into the school building. The little one was kicking and screaming whilst holding tight to the front gate, much to her mother's embarrassment - she gave me the knowing smile when I got nearer. Tempted to say something, a word of comfort perhaps? I was there in her shoes exactly a year ago but I didn't.

As my little one waved me goodbye (happily *roll eyes*), I couldn't help but feel a wee bit proud along with a tinge of sadness. Proud of how much she's grown tapi sedih knowing that she's not as attached to me as she was before, sure she'd come to me every morning for a hug or showers me with "Myra sayang mummy banyak-banyak". Not like I detest her being independent and all that (that's a part of growing, I know), it just feel like she's needing me less these days, so much so that she actually sleeps with her nenek at night these days. Sob. *clingy mum alert*

Haih lah anak, I do want you to grow, but please darling, not too fast, boleh?

of.1018.&.me.

This is my 1018th post.

Like yea, what in the world could I have possibly written the previous 1017 posts about? Tho the number is not something unusual or spectacular in any way - as this rambling space of mine started off ages ago, way back in 2003. So obviously,my posts varies - from student life, families, relationships and romance (or the lack of it), my daily rant as an IT slave, my transition from a bridezilla to C***'s other half, soon after as a mom-to-be, later - as a frantic mom of one and now, two.

Honestly, it's amazing to see how far I've come and grown (emotionally and ehem, physically). It feels like years before I started to write bout the kids' milestones, I'm actually writing mine.

Since today is the last day of 2014, let's wrap it all up.

Personally, I have my own ups and downs this year. The end of a year-long project at work. Myra's going-to-school drama (& dilemma on my side). The birth of our son. Mom's retirement. My 2nd confinement. My little brother's wedding.

Dad had a stroke (which has easily been one of the most terrifying days in my life) - but on the bright side, it brought us closer as a family. It made a very reliable and responsible man out of my baby brother - and now that he's going to be a father himself, the timing couldn't have been better - every cloud has a silver lining, that much is true.

My constant battle with trust, is something that I still have to work on.

Some bridges burned tho I'm yet to find out why. Sadly, it just did and we're just too in-denial to admit. Thanks to our Malay root, you know how our people would refrain from doing or saying anything, thinking that we are just being polite so we'd usually prefer to wait things out whilst to someone on the other side, it seems like we just don't care.

Someone close to you is in distress, you'd go "I have nothing to offer and I'm afraid of saying anything out of key, so I'd just wait until she/he feels better" the next thing you know, days, months and years have passed and everything is forgotten, including the relationship.

I do hope to make amends. I just have to figure out how.

I am, however, eternally grateful for everything. For the comfort, love and the stability that Allah has given me. I'm hoping, praying for a better year.

Let's hope for the best.

of.weekend.&.me.

We went to a wedding yesterday, a good one I hafta admit - due to its kids friendly location. A well air-conditioned, brightly-lit, huge, nicely decorated hall.

I don't even know the bride or the groom, supposed to be a daughter of someone from C***'s side of the family, but he had no idea who it's either. So yeah, we were there because MIL took us there - tho we did see a bunch of familiar faces.

The food was okay, tho I detest those makciks who were in charge of serving the lauks onto our plates - coz ya know, I didn't get to choose what I wanted. Like, I don't do nasi minyak kuah dalca banjir (even after I told the makcik, tanak kuah tetap la penuh kuah sepinggan ) or chicken breast, especially when I'm at a wedding, most often than not, those parts gonna end up tasting like rubber, hard and dry - but under the scrutinizing eyes of those makciks, I couldn't simply go

"Makcik, saya tanak yang banyak-banyak isi nanti keras, nak drumstick plis? Kuah pon tanak banyak-banyak sikit jer each, saya tak makan acar jeruk jugak. Makcik, saya tamau buah orange letak atas nasi." 

Kena lempang pulak kang. 

Yea, I'm fussy just like that, but it's better to choose something that I'd absolutely eat than having a plate piled up high, tapi ended up tak habis. Negating the whole idea of portion control = tak membazir + enough food for everyone.

Honestly, I totally get the idea of placing those makciks at the buffet table to do the appropriate portion control, but they just irk me sometimes. After all, a kenduri is 'jamu orang makan' (as my dad would put it) so what's up with the rigid control? Kot suka dia la nak makan/pilih apa pon.

Owh well?

Lain padang, lain belalang.

Had a lil detour after the wedding and managed to get myself a little something from Habib Jewel, something to be stacked against my (replacement) wedding ring (I lost my real wedding ring, remember?) since it's a pretty loose fit now. I'm not big on resizing, so getting a ring one size smaller than the current one is the solution to 'lock' the ring into place. Some of the retired rings and charms from Pandora are on sale too, but nothing tickles my fancy and the one that I want is yet to make its way to Malaysia, should probably start looking for it online.

We got back home, put the babies down to sleep as they were starting to get pretty cranky and off we went out for our lil rendezvous - a short one I hafta add. We managed to get back home in a wee bit more than an hour.

Oh yea, C*** finally got me a new iron, to replace the old temperamental one. I made him got me one those fancy Tefal turbo steam, super glide whatever not irons. I'm all about fanciness and efficiency, so yea, had a blast ironing (and face-steaming) last night (C*** even came into the laundry room to check on me, saying "Tengok mummy tu, dah dapat iron baru, iron baju lama-lama pon takde complaint.")  

No complaint? Riggggght. Me and not complaining do not sound quite right. I can complaint about anything. he he. Not like I love finding fault in everything, but if you want something honest, I can absolutely tell you my mind.


Anyway, the iron is great tapi terlebih turbo pulak steam function dia, even at the lowest steam setting - so the next time I'm about to do the ironing, might as well put a layer of charcoal mask on, 2 in 1 you see?

Okay, I'm not complaining, it's just an honest feedback. :P

Thank you handsome.  

Lepas ni get me the Dyson bladeless tower fan pulak, can ah?

of.expectation.&.me.

I have a thing when it comes to expectation. I detest hoping or expecting for something so when I do something for someone, I really don't expect much.

I do not expect to be showered with praises or flowers or gifts or anything along that line because when I did it, I did it because I wanted to, like c'mon, I won't let anyone bully me into doing something that I rather not do - unless they put a gun on my head or something, that is a different story altogether. You got the drift.

So yea, I have almost zero, nada expectation - tho honestly, a thank you would be nice.

But you know what ticks me off? Someone who couldn't be bothered to even utter a single word of appreciation but had the guts to throw a fit over a mere dissatisfaction.

It's like helping someone with an essay, you wrote the entire 1000 words perfect essay for them - only to have it thrown back in your face - just because you forgot to put a blardy dot on the last sentence.

Urgh..can't you put the dot on yourself? Do you not know how? Is it such a chore to add on that missing bit after all that has been done for you?

Susah sangat ke?

Like what's your problem?

You must be glad to be such an ass. I'll applaud you later.

of.BBW2014.&.me.

I finally went to the Big Bad Wolf 2014 last week on Wednesday, my 4th year of going cray cray over the books at one of the biggest book sale ever.

As usual, I went alone - all the better to salivate over the yummy books. Armed with a medium-sized trolly bag and a tote bag - just in case some of my catch couldn't fit into the big bag.

Got there at 9am after dropping Myra off at her playschool. The traffic was pretty smooth heading to  MIECC and since it's my 3rd time there, I am pretty well versed with the parking arrangement and got myself a good spot to park the car. They even had a pickup service in front of the main entrance - leave your books there, go and get the car and drive over to pick up the books - so you don't have to fret about having to lug those heavy books down the stairs if you happened to park downstairs, like I did last year. Nasib baik tak patah pinggang. I was heavily pregnant then.

So yea, I spent 4 hours there, with 30 mins tea break (the food selections wasn't too shabby, but I was not hungry so couldn't say much about it). Managed to roamed the hall for the 1st round within 2 hours. Sorted the books, deposited the full-to-the-brim trolly bag to storage and went for a 2nd round. Picked up some more books, deposited them to storage too and went for a break. Collected the books and after a final sorting, headed to the payments counters - which are as efficient as usual - to make the payment, whilst picking up some more books along the way.

My haul are mostly for myself. I bagged 16 general fiction and non-fiction books. I also dig memoirs. Yea, no romance and the sort for me. I don't do romance anymore tho I'm still the self-confessed sentimental junkie.

Bought a bunch of books for the kids too, as they are a bunch of little book-eaters, you just hafta replenish their book every year, the harder the cover, the better. :P


I didn't get as crazy as I did the previous years, so my catch was pretty moderate, so much so that I couldn't believe myself. Awesome self-control I hafta say. I even gave the John Grisham's books to little brother, so that he'll be able to read em first, whilst I'll slowly go through the rest of the haul.  Managed to finish a book so far - Keeper of the Light: Diane Chamberlain (it's the 1st book of a trilogy, hafta hunt for the others next time), 15 more to go.

They should suffice until the next BBW. I hope.

I feel like going for a 2nd trip, tapi cukup lah kot?

eXTReMe Tracker