This is my 1018th post.

Like yea, what in the world could I have possibly written the previous 1017 posts about? Tho the number is not something unusual or spectacular in any way - as this rambling space of mine started off ages ago, way back in 2003. So obviously,my posts varies - from student life, families, relationships and romance (or the lack of it), my daily rant as an IT slave, my transition from a bridezilla to C***'s other half, soon after as a mom-to-be, later - as a frantic mom of one and now, two.

Honestly, it's amazing to see how far I've come and grown (emotionally and ehem, physically). It feels like years before I started to write bout the kids' milestones, I'm actually writing mine.

Since today is the last day of 2014, let's wrap it all up.

Personally, I have my own ups and downs this year. The end of a year-long project at work. Myra's going-to-school drama (& dilemma on my side). The birth of our son. Mom's retirement. My 2nd confinement. My little brother's wedding.

Dad had a stroke (which has easily been one of the most terrifying days in my life) - but on the bright side, it brought us closer as a family. It made a very reliable and responsible man out of my baby brother - and now that he's going to be a father himself, the timing couldn't have been better - every cloud has a silver lining, that much is true.

My constant battle with trust, is something that I still have to work on.

Some bridges burned tho I'm yet to find out why. Sadly, it just did and we're just too in-denial to admit. Thanks to our Malay root, you know how our people would refrain from doing or saying anything, thinking that we are just being polite so we'd usually prefer to wait things out whilst to someone on the other side, it seems like we just don't care.

Someone close to you is in distress, you'd go "I have nothing to offer and I'm afraid of saying anything out of key, so I'd just wait until she/he feels better" the next thing you know, days, months and years have passed and everything is forgotten, including the relationship.

I do hope to make amends. I just have to figure out how.

I am, however, eternally grateful for everything. For the comfort, love and the stability that Allah has given me. I'm hoping, praying for a better year.

Let's hope for the best.